History Repeat Itself

Finally im back to blog.
Highly doubt anyone still checks this place anymore. But anyway, back here for a short update.
One year going to pass soon just like this. My SEC3 life is going to end soon, i'm going to be SEC4 soon which mean it going to be my last lap and major exam.
Exam has ended like a week ago so it means F.R.E.E.D.O.M for me , sadly no. I going to have intensive tuition (e.g Chi POA etc... ) My mum want me to catch up on my studies this holiday. Honestly speaking, for the past one year i has been slacking so much. Whenever teacher say there's test next day, i don't even bother study when i get home, i was like ' only test, who cares '. This EOY Exam i'm glad that i managed pass almost all of my subjects . POA failed again, but it's alright i did improved:) I know i tried my best for this time round exam, i put in all my effort wait not all but at least half. Honestly speaking, i'm still not really happy with my result.
1) If i didnt studied last minute i wont get such grade.
2) If i didnt slacked for this whole year, i wont get such grade too.
I told myself next years onward i need to study hard no more playing a fool, staying back in sch for nth, go home straight after school, revise my work everyday and LASTLY no more skipping school for nothing. I doesn't want to regret like what i had regretted in P6, PSLE. Thinking back of the past i realized im such a lazy and playful kid. I need to buck up on my studies.

Well, school's been great to me. But somehow there's abit of friendship problems.
To me, there are two ways to end a friendship.
1) The bitter, sad ones. Like, in the future when you think about that friendship, all you remember is pain. Nothing else.
2) Those friendship that ends. Just like that. But they still talk occasionally and when they do, they can talk about the past. Good memories. Not bitter ones.
If i were to end a friendship, i would love to end it the 2nd way. Because in future, whenever i think of the person, i want good memories to be the first thing that crosses my mind. Not bitter, sad ones that hurts a lot.
Last night, i was thinking. And i seriously did a lot of thinking. From how we started this friendship. And i had a...i don't know. And idea perhaps? I don't how to put it. kay. Honestly. You know, ever since the starting of September incident, i feel like i no longer understand you girls. Or maybe i never did. You know when you girls said that our friendship are (or were) strong. I couldn't help but think, no. That was how i felt. Because i was still afraid. And i felt that i couldn't understand you. Of course, there are times when i truly felt that we were back to before, but there are also times when i get insecure. I always used to say hi to B, but during that period B started to ignore me and stuff. I doesnt know what i have done wrong til you girls told me that i have neglect you all. GIRLS, you know who you girls are. I didn't left you girls out because of guy or whatever friends i had. I didn't even treat you girls like substitute. That month i have been seeing doctor like every week, eating medicine for like a month. That month is also the starting of EOY month that's why i was busy and started to neglect you girls. I didnt went out with others friends after school. I went home straight after school i took my pills and slept. Yes weekend i might go out with others friend to study, but sometimes not i didnt want ask you girls alot. Some of you might be busy, sometimes i got tuition before that i doesnt know what time i ending. So whenever i ended my tuition i will random text friends ask them if they want to study with me. That month my parents are strict too, they doesnt like me to stay in school to frequent or what. Of course i must obey them right. They are my parents. This few night, i had been thinking why will i separate with you girls. I miss out the fun with you girls yes i miss. I miss those joke, those lunch outing simply i miss everything. I miss those times we saw each other and say hi smile laugh joke. Thanks for giving me those wonderful memories. Really. Thank you. And you've taught me many things. That i may not be able to learn from other friends. You know. At times like these, it really makes me think. And i start realising things that i've never realised before. All these words are from my heart. Honestly. None of these are lies. In my heart, you girls are always my goodfriends. Like my sisters.

Life has been better for me, my mum and my relationship is better now. We started heart to heart talk etc... SHOPPING used to be my favorite now im started to get bored of it. Im starting to lost interest in shopping. I dont know why either. Im starting to prefer staying at home then going out. This holiday school bringing us to Cambodia Trip i doesn't know should i be excited or what. This holiday i also need to go and slim down my fat thigh and arm. HAHA. okay lah, im really getting fatter and fatter. I really need go on diet and do exercise like seriously:( been eating oily food. Yesterday went to eat some buffet too. OKAY ACTION SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORD. GOGOGOGO!!!!!! i can do it =)

Relationship, AHHHH. Been thinking that my past is full of crap. Yes it's full of crap. All the while those relationship is puppy love. What's is love in our age now? Study hard now and get a good partner in future, this is the way. We're just too young to have r/s and manage well our r/s. We cant handle our r/s as such age. Yes totally we cant. I rather we spent those time with god than those r/s that's meaningless with no outcome If you found a right partner and who's mature enough to handle the relationship this may have some outcome, this is called meaningful and real love... seriously, i think our age now is seriously hardly can last til we marriage. unless those really true love and ur partner is older than you like more than 5years than maybe can last, if not hardly.... ACTUALLY AGE DOESNT MATTER, HAHAH YEAH!!! go uni and find a good partner, maybe JC... but not now man seriously . people can change...

Overall, 2011 going to past soon just like this. 2011 been a super tired year and super. Things been up and down. Hope 2012 is a better year ahead(: